Sunday, December 27, 2009


The city of the full moon

Elation and bittersweet pain

Movie-like scenes, days and dramas

Smiles that hug tears


Successes and failures

Writing, rediscovered

Loved blemishes, and beauty only I can see

Memories and friends

Sexy scars

Dreams, lots of dreams


Maturity, Immaturity and lessons learned

Full moons

Happiness without reason

Timeless music

The imaginary shot of scotch and cigarette that come to my rescue


January, July and December

Faith, belief, nostalgia, hope, silver linings and revelations

Who I was, who I am and who I am meant to be

Finding God

24/12/2009, 4.35 am, 12°C and a hot mug of coffee

"Hell or Glory, I don't want anything in between"

Music is comfortable, miracles are plausible and endless stories exist

This year has been far too kind to me

© Getty Images

The Song: She's My Winona - Fallout Boy

Monday, December 21, 2009


Sometimes, we slip into solipsism and become oblivious to those whose lives intersect with ours. We simply refuse to see where they're coming from. We refuse to see the shadows they drag behind.

Those who forever walk towards the sun will never know what a shadow is.

It is like we're all walking towards our respective suns, and in the process, empathy is lost, and more importantly, some lose track of who they are.

I need a dreamcatcher, one that will help me survive the dawn of red mist and the dusk of agony and despair. One that will make me turn my back on the sun and remember what my shadow looks like. One that will show me others' shadows…

I don't mind the world today.

© Getty Images

The Song: Starts When You Fall - The Killer And The Star

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Kyrie's Melody

it rained for days on end

flooding my mind

wave after wave

crashing on the rocks

beckoning us

take a dip!

the little child jumped in

i remained ashore

i watched

he swam in a black sea

surrounded by a silver aura

he waved at me

in fear, i smiled

let's go, I cried

but he swam away

it rained some more

the waves gnarled and roared

he can't go

he's all I have

until I save Kyrie he's all I have

he dreams, he smiles

he can't go

i jumped into darkness

i swam my body weary

sweet water mixed with tears


before the music stops playing

before the sky's tears run dry

could I have found you?

the last breath is finally here

overtaken by a dark cold wave

I close my eyes


there's a silver shimmer

down at the bottom

that last breath will have to wait

i swim deeper

i can see him clearly now

sitting at the bottom

overwhelmed with happiness

i swim closer

he's not alone


© Getty Images

The Music: Postcards from Far Away - Coldplay

Saturday, December 5, 2009

A Disarray of Conversational Longing

"The Coal isn't lighting up"

"Not to worry ! I will set it on fire with my Hadoken !"

"What the heck is that ?"


There used to be a kid who lived in a fantasy world. A kid who used to think that if he concentrated real hard and shouted out "adoogen", energy will burst from his wrists. I really miss that kid and his world.

© Getty Images


"Are you asleep ?"

"Of course, Lamiss, it is 2:30 in the morning, and why the heck are you calling me ?"

"There's a burglar in the house"


"I heard something coming from the kitchen, that’s why I was scared to come out of my room and come tell you. Can you go check ?"

"Lulu, I have loads of work early in the morning, don't be silly"




"There's nothing out there"

"Are you sure? Have you checked the whole house ?"


"Ok, thank you"

"Good night"

"Sorry for waking you up"

"Don't worry about it sweetheart"

I can't believe you're already 18. You'll always be my baby sister though; I don't care how old you are.

© Getty Images

"Haha ! And I was wondering why you're mom bought pickles while there was no food in the house ! You managed to plot all these plans right under my nose and I couldn't even notice !"

"Happy Birthday, Baba"

I hate the fact that I am now taller than you are, because in my head, I still look up to you. I love you.

© Getty Images

Recently, I realized that I am a very nostalgic person, thanks to Jess. This in turn has led me to an even bigger realization. Nostalgia for the past is one thing, but nostalgia for the future ? I am now more nostalgic for the future than I am for the past.

© Getty Images

Random Thoughts:

So I was watching titanic the other day (it was on while I worked, don't judge me) and I made a great discovery. Technically, it was jack and rose who sunk the freaking thing. If they hadn't decided to fool around like idiots on deck, the sailors wouldn't have been distracted from looking out for incoming danger, and they would have seen the approaching iceberg sooner.

I hate people who lick their fingers to flip pages. Where the heck did this idea come from ? Am I supposed to hold the licked document after you're done with it ?! God created opposable thumbs for a reason !! Asswipe.

We have a very cool janitor at work. He actually listens to music on his mp3 player as he cleans the office up. Pretty stereotypically movie like. The only problem is that he doesn't hear the sounds he makes as he cleans. He sounds like a Neanderthal learning to speak.

I guess you know you're beard is too long when it actually starts fluttering with the wind. It's nature's way of telling you that an alien race will be able to invade earth using your beard as headquarters. I'm not shaving though. Give me one reason to shave (not looks related) and I will.


The Song: Everlong – Foo Fighters .. Sends shivers down my back, every time.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Souvenirs...Real Blood for a Change

The second she saw me, she collapsed in my arms and broke in tears.

Never, will I ever forget the moment my mother cried her heart out as she squeezed me tight. Amidst all the crap I went through during my night in Sudan, this is the only thing that hurt, a lot.

A couple of years ago, I along with four of my friends got in a fight with the workers of a gas station located in one of the lower class areas of Egypt. I can vaguely remember why we got in that fight, but I do know that it was over a stupid reason. The result was that we found ourselves surrounded by 25 angry workers who were already holding societal grudges. I still have a scar on my arm and another on the back of my head to remind me of that day.

There's now a new one on my back to remind me of my time spent in Khartoum.

I don't get why I had to spend a night abroad maneuvering my way out of harm, nor do I get why a city became a war zone because of a soccer match. More importantly, I don't see why my loved ones had to suffer because of my foolishness.

This whole issue is beyond me; it is yet another addition to my portfolio of enigmas and scars.

I'd love to hate Algeria, but that would be illogical. May what we're going through be real patriotism or not, hating an entire nation still does not make sense.

So, I'm back, angry, scarred and confused. Anger fades away, scars make me sexier (at least I hope so) and I've learned to love confusion lately.

Without enigmas and scars, there wouldn't be silver linings. I love silver linings.

Yesterday was the end of the craziest couple of weeks of my life. Yesterday was a silver lining.

"Other things may change us, but we start and end with family"

Eid Mubarak Everyone!!

Random Thoughts:

My bus was on fire, I had shattered glass all over me in addition to a bleeding shoulder and back, but I still managed to flash them Algerians a big grin, just like I did the station workers. Up yours!

There was this ginormous brick coming at me through the bus window, and I swear, I could almost see it coming in slow motion. When I thankfully dodged it, I laughed like a total nut; it was so absurd that I simply couldn't believe it was happening.

"I don't care too much for money, money can't buy me love"

66 work hours a week will make one see this sentence very differently. And yes, I did the math. With my current lifestyle, I shall remain eternally si-hi-ngle. That is so not my plan.

Rain, lightning and thunder while driving at dawn?! Thank you lord.

Coup de Foudre, Je te cherche partout

The Song: Rain - Creed

Monday, November 9, 2009


"You don't have to be Superman all the time"

My mother said that to me today.

I wish I could though.

The Song: Fairytales and Castles - Lifehouse

Monday, November 2, 2009

I Wrote this on the Night of a Full Moon

Lately, Cairo's sky has been exceptional to say the least. On my way to work this morning, I noticed that the clouds were…puffy. It's like our cruel sky has finally decided to abandon the 2 dimensional realm and become 3 dimensional for a change. I've also never seen it this blue. It looked like a vintage oil painting.

That is good change.

It often happens that I think extensively but don't quite know what I'm thinking about. It's like walking into a cloud of bees where every bee is a different thought or idea. I'm not sure if anyone has experienced this, but it's quite hectic. Nothing really solves this mental predicament for me. The only remedy is usually a trigger that deciphers my intellectual matrix and makes some sense out of its complexities, may it be a friend, a child's smile or time well spent on my PS3. They are variant and variable, but the one thing that always does the trick, is a full moon.

I wait every month for the day I go tête-à-tête with the full moon. He's become more like a friend to me.

The moon and I, we go way back.

So, on the ride back home, a week of intermingled contemplation was reassembled poetically.

Clear and vivid as the sky was tonight, I still found the full moon to be the star of the show. Every time I look at full moon, I always think of the many other places I'd rather be watching it from. The Eiffel tower, a Venetian river and a Hurghadian beach all come to mind, but that's not my point.

I was more than happy just watching the glamour of the moon through my car's roof, yet I never seized to think about how I can admire it better. No matter how content we are, we always tend to imagine the improved versions of the realities we're living in. There always are a number of modifications and additions that we think would optimize the current conditions. That to me is only natural…

But why is it natural?

Some may argue that being fully content is unfeasible, while others claim that greed constantly gnaws at one's satisfaction with the status quo.

I however, think that one can be fully content. I can't claim that I have reached that level, but I know I've been as close as possible, many times.

Never have I ever seen a man who turned down the world's plea to serve.

He who does will have defied gluttony and embraced happiness.

When the world bows down to me, I want to be that man.

The Song: Beautiful Day - U2

Saturday, October 31, 2009

When Time Smiles: Schadenfreude

I've been putting this piece off for a very long time. I however don't think that there'll be a better day than All Hallow's Eve to post it. This is the kind of story I wouldn't read to my kids at their early age, not because it's scary, but because it was written by my darkest self. Nevertheless, the emotions through which it was written still are sinfully yet guiltlessly delicious.

This piece could be considered a parallel dimension to my first When Time Smiles, or a different persona for the same realm. Either way, I'm in love with it.

Another crumpled up paper landed on a pile of similar ones in the trash can next to his desk. He has thus far failed to come up with an ending that satisfied him. He gazed at the empty strips in disappointment and couldn't for the life of him think of anything that would decorate them to his liking. With a loud groan he stretched and lay back on his chair placing his legs up on the desk.

Some say old age teaches people unforgettable lessons, but it seems that this old man has done the exact opposite. This aged chap has conversed thoroughly with time, challenged the discourse of old age, and taught them both lessons that they should pass on. He wore rectangular framed glasses that seemed to make his narrow blue eyes even more squinted. He scratched his bald head thinking, and then rearranged the few patches of gray hair on the sides and the back of his head. He looked fine for a man his age.

After looking at the ceiling for a while, the wise man closed his eyes attempting to visualize the last page of the final installment of his world famous comic book. Many awaited this last chapter anxiously, counting on the renowned artist's power to amaze and surprise. He would hate to disappoint.

To many, inspiration has a mind of its own. It hits you like a bolt of lightning on a sunny day. It comes at the strangest of times, when you're least prepared. To him however, it was awfully different. He summoned inspiration; he beckoned it to his service. This was a man who commanded inspiration.

In a moment of sheer brilliance, the images lined up in front of his intellect each waiting its turn to be drawn on paper. He saw the end.

He picked up his pencil.

A dark moonless night engulfed the globe, its wind howled and screamed at him like a cursed banshee. The sea never sounded angrier and the sand under his feet never felt colder. He staggered across the vicious darkness looking for her. He was looking for his angel.

A sturdy mountain line stood tall in the middle of this madness, its power reinforced his dark faith and fed his demons.

A golden shimmer caught his eye, and he instantly knew that he'd found her. As he approached the glistening light he saw the beautiful golden curls that were emitting it. Her hair danced beautifully with the storm. He found his angel.

She stood in a strapless long white dress that seemed to blend with her folded wings and looked at him with beautiful blue eyes. He walked silently towards her.

Moments later, they were standing face to face. He almost smiled, but held it in, for it was not the time to smile. Not yet.

Her eyes spoke their usual beguiling charm, charm that had always enchanted him.

Not this time.

She felt sharp pain in her left side, and looked down to see a knife sticking out of it. He twisted it violently inside her, and that is when he smiled. If a smile could ever be heard, it would be his. A toothy grin looked her in the eyes, probing down to her very soul. He could hear her screaming on the inside, and it made him happy. He savored every moment of sweet pain she was enduring.

Blood streamed down her dress as her eyes widened with horror. Using his free hand he pulled her towards him. This was his final hug. She pushed him away frantically, and spread her wings to escape his wrath.

In a split second the knife had sliced her neck, and a fountain of blood sprayed his face.

Her blood was freezing cold.

He was not the least bit surprised.

She collapsed to the ground and squirmed in pain. He stood above her still smiling, for this was his angel's final descent. Her anguish was his bliss.

He laughed and she cried but neither was heard.

Silent onomatopoeias.

As she approached her demise she looked at him and spread a hand towards him, trying to hold his for the last time. He stepped on her hand crushing it in the sand.

"Rot in hell"

He put his pencil down, lit his pipe and paused for a few moments to relish his masterpiece.

"So, you killed her" a soft hand held his right shoulder

"You can't kill those whose souls are dead"

His life partner smiled. She kissed him on the cheek and left as silently as she'd come.

The old man eyed the last comic strip.

Her eyes turned stone cold. He knelt down and gently pushed her head to face the rising sun. He plucked a feather from her wings, while his creator picked up his pencil again.

In a rare moment where fiction intersects with reality, in cold blood, they both drew a smiling face on the angel's cheek.

Her cold blood.

Tonight, I Take my Demoness Out on a Date

The Song: The Undertaker – Puscifer

Sunday, October 25, 2009

A Monochromatic World

Change of seasons is taking over my mind. It feels as if every particle of the incoming winter winds is touching my skin for the first time. It never felt so new. The novelty of the feeling has also brought about a question.

What was the fist season to engulf earth's hemisphere? More accurately, what were the first two seasons to embrace our Northern and Southern skies?

I personally believe that it was the Winter/Summer complexion that first interlaced in the realm that is our planet. Why I believe so has many explanations. One explanation could be my personal bias towards winter, that I consider to be the beginning of a year, summer being its end.

The second and undeniably more important explanation is Yin Yang, dualities of life and nature. From quiescence opposites are created together to complement each other in the embodiment of a larger craftwork, a greater meaning and significance. Trading places eternally until they return to quiescence, Yin and Yang shall intertwine with the meanings of our life giving rise to each other.

Black and White, Darkness and Light, Evil and Good, Night and Day, Dusk and Dawn, Winter and Summer, Love and Hate. Yin Yang doesn't believe in Fall or Spring, for they are both shades of gray. It is us humans, who believe in gray.

We need to learn, for extremes and opposites confuse and at many times vanquish us. We do embark on black and white, but we need to swim through the gray sea that separates those two islands.

That's why I believe that the first season known to Man, is Spring. Adam and Eve needed to learn, to get acquainted to the mortal life before the harsh unforgiving earthly conditions punish them and cast spells on them from which they can't break free. Thus, what better season than the heavenly spring to bring about a familiar feeling to the outcasts from heaven?

Winter and Summer maybe time's most ancient Yin Yang, and maybe the world was born in gray. Concerning the latter, I certainly hope not.

The Song: The Verve Pipe - The Freshmen

Saturday, October 24, 2009

For the Love of Cairo

Good weather is good news. The current weather however, is mind blowing. To me, weather has an aroma … a flavor. Each flavor is associated with a memory, a feeling and state of mind. Fall and winter have always charmed me, but this fall is something else. Its flavor is one I haven't tasted in a very long time.

A couple of days ago I swear I could feel the heat wave break. I was sitting in a well ventilated area and a refreshing breeze took over the place. It was in such contrast with the current feel of air that I knew these were new winds. I've been in a super good mood ever since.

For the past couple of days, on my way back from the other side of town heading home, I've been taking the downtown road instead of the ugly 6th of October Bridge. I pop my car's sun roof open, and seize the weather along with alluring beauty of the enchanting city. Cairo is one gorgeous city. My favorite. There's only one city that is as dear to me or maybe even dearer, but that's a different story for a different day.

A drive downtown, coupled by the bedazzlement of approaching winter is a remedy to almost any thirsty heart or uneasy mind. If you pay enough attention, you'll trace memories and emotions to the minuscule details of every street, square and corner of this city. I love Cairo.

Korba at dawn. Early summer, I stayed up just to see what it looks like

You can't catch the sun rising from Korba, but the break of dawn in this place still is astounding

Random Thought:

Creed, Foo Fighters and Cold new albums are due to be released throughout the upcoming month. This is shaping to be a wonderful fall, followed an exceptional winter.

The Song: The Way I Am - Staind

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The Absurdity Post

Yesterday, I was talking with Sara about how something could be so absurd it is actually awesome.

To hell with contemplation and profundity. Here's to absurdity.

The Finnish president is coming to Egypt today to discuss "Issues of the Middle East" with her Egyptian counterpart.

F: "About that Middle East Mr. President"

E: "Lots of crap going on"

F: "Indeed, lots of crap"

*Chirping Cockroaches*

Then she'll meet up with the first lady, to discuss women's role in communal building of peace and security. Oh, that's original.

I mean, what the heck does Finland have to do with the Middle East? Political façades that don't even contribute to proper diplomatic ones, really annoy me.

Furthermore, the whole seminar on women with the first lady is so stereotypical and clichéd; it is actually counterproductive to the concept of women empowerment. I mean, why can't the president himself discuss that? It doesn't have to be the first lady. A man can endorse women's causes

This whole visit is ass.

I guess that was the crappy part of absurdity, not the one I mean, but I guess I brought it up to build an absurdity spectrum.

So without further ado,

How about this for absurdly awesome music:

Tenacious D: Classico and Beelzeboss (Dave Grohl from Foo Fighters is Satan, how awesome is that?)

Rodney Carrington: Dear Penis (Such an inappropriate masterpiece)

Fantabulous I tell ya.

Childhood cartoons and animes were also absurdly fantastic. I mean, soccer players who spend episodes and episodes mid-air, running or shooting a ball? A bunch of super robots beating the crap out of each other? Doesn't get any better than this…

Captain Majed!

Grendizer and Mazinger, anyone?

Simply Awesome

Notice that ماهر is actually looking towards the camera? Poser.

As to who would win if these two super bots were to scuffle, I say Grendizer. Because of him:

Duke Fleed!!

If he were to go head to head with Batman however, the Bat would hand the Duke his own ass. No one beats Batman, no one.

Speaking of handing asses, that is exactly what we're going to do to Algeria when they come to get mangled in Cairo arena on the 14th of November. The hype for this match is absurd. Vive l'Egypte!!

اتفرج لو بتحب مصر!!

Random Absurd Thoughts:

Some people have a frown on their face early in the morning if they hadn't had their coffee yet. Lack of coffee makes them grumpy they say, so they frown. I disagree. I believe that simply brow muscles don't get the needed energy to lift the eye-brows in a normal position, except after coffee intake. Especially with thick ones like mine…

My friend picked me up today to go to work (we work together), I discovered that she is that kind of driver that would actually make me get out of my car, walk to her's and punch her in the head. She also narrates her daily driving events as they happen. She's still a beginner, and I understand. I love her for it and in absolute terms.

The radio today played "Ironic" for Alanis Morisette, which brought back oh so many memories. But I really believe the name of the song is kind of irrelevant to the lyrics. I think it'd rather be "Things that Piss me off" or "You know what Really Grinds my Gears?" the latter is copyrighted to Peter Griffin – Family Guy.

Video Game coolness is to run around eating mushrooms that make you bigger, flowers that make you throw fireballs and killing enemies by simply jumping on them. That is absurdly cool and I miss this kind of simple fun. Super Mario was and still is awesome.


I'm only one week into my blogging frenzy, and I already got my first award. Sweet. Its gonna take a while to pass it on though, because being the newbie that I am, I don't know that much bloggers and not all of them are worthy of it, in my opinion. Arigato مي.

Around the office I'm usually blurting out loud linguistically wrong and occasionally inappropriate yet hilarious vocabulary (Arabic and English), beating people up, messing with others' work and picking on Dina (among others). In short, I'm the "shenanigans" kind of guy. When I'm not doing that and I'm actually working with a straight face for a change, people think I'm different. Really?!

The Song: When You Were Young – The Killers. I found this tune lying around on my hard drive accidentally and I must say, this is a great song in so many different ways.